I, Too, Thought Exercise Was a Dirty Word

One member of the vast team of medical people keeping me alive told me the other day that she doesn't like to use the word "exercise" because so many people have an strong aversion to that word. People my age grew up believing that exercise was only for the very determined and that it involved straining oneself. In the last couple of decades we have all been told that normal everyday things like walking and gardening are also exercise. So why do we still hate that word?

I think too many people still equate it with work instead of pleasure. I learned the magical benefits of exercise fifteen plus years ago yet I still let myself become a couch potato who viewed exercise as a whole lot of work that, weighed against doing nothing, seemed like too much effort. But truth be told, I had, in fact, stopped living my life, because who wouldn't want to go for a walk? A walk is a pleasant and enjoyable thing for everyone who is at all able-bodied.

Or how about the motto "No pain, No gain"? I've never experienced pain in my fitness endeavours. I know that elite athletes will push themselves to the limits to get better and probably experience lactate acid in their muscles when they push it. But you and I need to push ourselves to improve our fitness and health just by going for a walk.

To the sedentary, walking is pushing our limits. But our bodies wake up and adapt. We get fitter, stronger and healthier by doing very gentle things. I'm going to continue using that dirty word "exercise," if you don't mind.

I Just Did Something Remarkable, Surreal, and Previously Unimaginable

It actually warmed up an hour after I got home.

I went for a walk, but this post isn't about fitness. Hell, this isn't even about obesity, really. I headed out in a -31° C. temperature with a dangerous wind chill of -45° C. Let me quote to you from this evening's government-issued weather warning: "At these extreme wind chill values frostbite on exposed skin may occur in less than 10 minutes."

Wow, what an amazing experience I just had! When you get older and you don't have a lot of money, new and amazing experiences are hard to come by. But they're what make life great. They're what slow down the ever-increasing speed of time as you age. They're what help keep you young.

Before you have me committed, let me explain. This is like petting a snake if you have a snake phobia. I have a bit of a winter phobia. It's more of a mindset that when winter comes, we have to cocoon. And therefore, winter is bad. That's a terrible attitude to have because winter is 2/3rds of our year where I live on the Canadian prairies.

Two reasons why I did this: Firstly, I bought a pair of traction aids for walking on slippery snow and ice today. They were on clearance for $8 from $25 (Bentley, Northgate Mall, Regina.) They're not the coil style, they're the cleat style. I didn't want to wait this cold snap out to see how they work. I have had lots of near-slips when I'm out walking because there's a lot of ice due to the warm winter (yeah, it's certainly not warm any more.)

Secondly, I wanted to see what the limits of my winter gear are, and find out how effective my layering method of dressing is. I hadn't planned on going past my driveway but when my traction aids made walking seem incredibly easy and secure (like walking on dry pavement), I had to see if I could go down to the end of the block. Then I had to see if I could go further. I felt like I was the first astronaut walking on Mars.

Earlier in the evening, we went out to a modest dinner to celebrate my wife's birthday. Most people in Regina  stayed home tonight. It's bloody cold, even for here. I was in pain from the cold wind just from the few seconds it took me to plug our car in and run into the house when we got home from the restaurant. Our whole family huddled under covers for an hour to warm up after the cake was consumed. So what on earth drove me to go do this? Curiosity, I guess. And a little determination.

The wind was strong coming off the open highway near our house. I didn't feel any discomfort so I kept going, afraid to stray too far from home under such adverse conditions. After a few minutes, my wrists started to get cold. I pulled down my sleeves a bit further and my gloves up on my arms a bit. Problem solved and I returned to my home but decided to keep going, right into the fierce, potentially deadly wind.

I was fine. The only part of my body exposed were my eyeballs. As I approached the open area around the highway, the bridge of my nose got cold. I pulled down my woolly toque over my eyebrows but it only partially helped. I decided to walk into the relative shelter of a street. From then on, I wasn't cold anywhere. My biceps, of all things, were a bit cool, but not uncomfortably so. There must be something weak in the lining of my coat. It could have been solved by wearing an extra long sleeve shirt or maybe a different fleece middle layer.

I was out in that for half an hour. The worst part was worrying that I may have died and it was all a post-death dream. It was just too easy. With ski goggles, who knows what I could have accomplished out there.

Here's what I wore, from head to toe:

Thick woolly toque over:
MEC Outdoor Research balaclava with mesh over the mouth area
Wind River gloves ($45, Mark's)
Short sleeve t-shirt
Fleece jacket from Walmart as a mid-layer
Cheap Walmart winter jacket as an outer layer
Three layers of sweat pants, with the wind-breaking pants on the outside
Old fashioned thick wool socks (Mark's)
An old pair of worn out runners
Traction Aids pulled over my runners

My feet weren't the slightest bit cold, I swear to you. When your core is warm while you're doing the slightest bit of exercise, your extremities are toasty. It's one thing to read this, it's another to prove it to yourself.

So...I just kicked winter in the ass, maybe even K-O'd it. Take that, winter! That's for repressing me and all those I love for all these years!

It was remarkable. It's especially remarkable for the fat person who is always making excuses not to go outside in any weather, let alone this. Who in their right mind would go for a walk in -45 windchills? Certainly not the fat guy.

The obese person has a lot of voices in her or his head saying, "You can't." My perceptions of what are possible have changed once again, while I learn that those voices aren't necessarily right.

I'm still not quite sure I'm not dead. Will I do it again? Why not? The side walks aren't very crowded in this weather!

My Big, Dumb--WRONG--Preconceptions

When I started to hit my exercise stride (so to speak) early last summer, there was one thing I dreaded: Summer ending.

I was focused on the silliest of things. I dreaded cool temperatures, let alone cold temperatures. I had it in my mind that I needed to accomplish much of my fitness and weight-loss goals by mid-August, of all times. That's not even the end of Summer, even in Saskatchewan.

Beyond that, I was hell-bent on getting my weight down to 325 pounds by October 30th. I had it ingrained in me that I couldn't be active after Halloween because the cold weather has kept me in in the past. 325 is the weight limit of my home treadmill and I wanted to make sure I could use it in time for winter. It was my summer ending safety net. I didn't reach that goal. I fell short by ten pounds.

But here it is, mid-December, and I'm outdoors getting my usual exercise and loving it. My only challenge is the occasional near-slip, but there are products (traction aids) you can buy to alleviate that problem.

With the right clothes and knowing how to layer, there's no reason not to keep living as per usual when winter comes.

However, deep snow and -40 wind chills are two things that I'll have to wait and see I how deal with those. But just remember, people do go on expeditions to the South Pole and sleep in tents. I should be able to walk around the block and not complain.

A Fantastic Walk/Jog Tonight Leads Me to Write

Chrystal Levy's story is very similar to mine

Since my unpleasant, adrenaline-pumping incidents on the streets of my neighbourhood last week, I've had plenty of feedback and heard many horrible stories. But most people soldier on, especially those whose health depends on it. Myself, I chose to keep walking past Angry Entitled Teenager's house because it's on my normal walking route.

This attitude applies to everything in life: Don't let your fears get the best of you, meet them head on. That said, I'm wired for confrontation. It has to do with a troubled upbringing. I have to get past that. If I seek confrontation, or don't avoid it when possible, I could run the risk of being in a violent situation when it is totally unnecessary. I've also watched a number of self-defence videos on YouTube that helped put me at ease.

In the last week or so I've been doing a little jogging every night instead of 6 or 7 minutes twice per week. Depending on how I felt I might do as little as thirty seconds, just to spice up my walk, or a couple of bouts of two minutes. I wanted to try something different to see how my body and fitness level would respond. Then last night I just walked without any jogging so I could rest up for a longer jog tonight.

Tonight was fantastic. I was strong, my heart rate was relatively moderate and I barely broke a sweat. On other nights I will seek out a higher (85%) heart rate by running slightly faster, at least for a while at the end, and I'll welcome the inevitable buckets of sweat, but tonight, it was comforting to have my seven minute jog seem almost effortless.

My goal with running is to gradually increase it and add some spice to my workout routine beyond just walking. It really is great to get the heart pumping for a sustained period. It's the greatest natural drug you can get. If you absolutely refuse to ever try a little running, I know a couple of women who do Zumba (Latin dance workouts.)

I saw a story on the national news Friday night about a woman who very much reminded me of me and my journey in the last few months. She was feeling sore, drained of energy and very immobile. She started walking and she's a very different woman today. You can watch the video of the news story here. Think of me when you do and know that I spend my days looking forward to my next workout.

The Fire in My Belly

When I started this process, I think the Tanita body composition scale said I was something like 200 pounds over-weight. I had a BMI of nearly 50. I really have yet to improve upon those numbers that much. Maybe more importantly of note, I had lived an ever-deteriorating sedentary lifestyle (how could I not have with those numbers?)

Over the two years prior to the start of my change I more and more often felt disabled. It's not that I was lamenting not being able to run a marathon, but that I couldn't do normal, able-bodied person things like stand up for an extended period, for example. I began to avoid everyday, common situations that might be too physically demanding for me. A social invitation had to be analysed: Could I fit in the booth at that restaurant? Could I handle being outside in the heat at a barbecue? I was feeling less and less capable. I was concerned that I was becoming truly disabled.

A severely overweight person misses out on a lot of things. Lacking speed and agility on the playground as a kid was only the beginning of my life's problems, not to mention the social stigma of being overweight (I wonder if it's any easier nowadays since there a lot more kids with weight problems.) The one time I tried out for organized sports when I was a child, I was sent home for being too heavy. There was a weight limit on the pee-wee football team. I could give you a thousand such examples. I  won't give them all to you at once, but I'll spread some of them out in other posts over time.

A fat person grows up feeling shackled, unable to do everything that a normal (healthy) person does, unable to live life to the fullest, unable to do everything they want to. Every day growing up they are more and more conditioned into believing they are not equal to the healthy majority.

This is why there's a fire in my belly. An exercise fire. I am determined to change my body to make it the healthiest, strongest, most capable I can. And walking's just not going to cut it.

I've been told for years by medical professionals to walk. Walking is healthy and is an excellent exercise for anyone of any age and any fitness level. But it only goes so far in changing the body to make it all it can be. I yearn to be more fit.

The fire was stoked last night when I went on a bike ride with my young son through every nook and cranny of our subdivision. It was casual, it was easy and I felt like I did when I was a kid. It brought me back to moments and evenings of riding my bike when I was young and the feelings of freedom and the fun that I had. Throughout the years, and through many bicycles, I've often felt I had a special relationship with my given bike of the day that involved bonding and trust. I once again have that relationship with my bike. If that sounds hokey, you've never been a passionate cyclist.

Those around me through the years have sometimes categorized me as someone who won't grow up. A very few frustrating people have thumbed their noses at me every time I did or said something less than serious. I pity this type of serious, constrained, often joyless person. There's nothing wrong with having fun and letting your guard down as an adult. There's nothing wrong we staying young. I've been a happier person and a better person for it.

But a person with a serious weight problem frequently misses out on those good feelings for all kinds of reasons. We often feel restrictions from being socially ostracised, not being able to participate in everything that life has to offer, or simply from the mindset you develop where you think you can't or shouldn't do a lot of things because of your weight. I never allowed myself to swim in public, for example (more on that on another day.) Is there anything more fun than playing in water? I missed out on that.

My medical professionals always seem to be telling me to take it easy and concentrate on changing my lifestyle in a lasting way. They remind me to be patient. But once the shackles start coming off, you want it all. If a person confined to a wheel chair for much of his or her life could suddenly walk, I'm sure they'd want to run. And run and run! That analogy might be a little overblown, but I hope it helps you better understand how I feel.

I do worry that, like with so many other things with me, it'll be all or nothing when it comes to fitness. I fear that I might not have the time or enthusiasm some day and just stop (again.)

For now, though, my life-long profession is that of athlete. I want to become a little more fit every day and start taking back what I've missed out on. That means jogging, cycling and having access to equipment at the gym. At the core of my fitness routine will be walking, but there's so much more my body is capable of, and it's exhilarating to discover that every day.